Friday, January 11, 2008

Live

My favorite shoes. Walking on my favorite thing.
Soul searching tonight. I am half-way through re-organizing my bedroom, but tonight I decided to just chill a bit instead. The kids are finally asleep and Aaron is at a scout camp-out..freezing his butt off I am sure! My poor Georgia boy in the snow...it's a sight to behold!

This past year was so busy. So hard. So quick. I want this year to be different. To reach milestones, yes. But to feel the journey more. This year..I want to live. My kids are growing so fast. I keep trying to remember when they were tiny. When they were attached to my hip. When they depended on me more. My job is so demanding that I often have to push them aside. And now look at me. I miss them. I miss my being with them.

I'm getting closer to 30. By 30, I was supposed to have 4 children and be completely successful in...something greater than myself. I'm running out of time. What happened to just enjoying the run?
Ahhhhhh...I used to love running because it was a stress relief. I even loved running in the cold. I remember living in Pennsylvania during my high school years, throwing my orange hat and gloves on, and pacing myself as my breath frosted in front of me. It was so cold, and I felt the moment so deeply. It's such an exhilarating feeling to recognize the warmth of your body as your heart rate increases and to feel it contrast with the freezing snow. If I could just take that memory and somehow apply it to my life. To enjoy the run. To feel and see each breath. To live.
.... even (or especially) when it's cold.

The Story of the Snowflake

The tiny snowflake lay in God’s hand. Among stars and galaxies it was so very tiny. But her great Creator’s heart loved it best. For with all truth and light he had sculpted this one little snowflake.

“In all time and space, nothing shall ever be like you”’ God whispered, “And you are mine.”

“If I keep you in my hand you shall be perfect and your beauty shall never change,” He said. “But my tiny one you shall miss the best part”.

He signed and blew the snowflake from his hand and it fell into immense darkness. The snowflake was terrified! But God’s breath carried it as a gentle wind, guiding it as it fell. The snowflake felt a wondrous new feeling.

“What is this”, it thought.

And God’s voice whispered “Freedom”!

And the snowflake felt such joy that she began to dance her own beautiful dance. Other snowflakes fell and danced, but it was not at all like her special dance. Suddenly she stopped for she touched the earth and she lay with all the others in crystal silence. She felt a part of something, something great and important.

When morning dawned the sunlight turned the fields of snow glorious with light. The snowflake realized her coming had somehow changed the earth. The sunlight warmed her and she too began to change.

“What shall I become”, she thought.

“Indeed”, God smiled. “What shall you become?”

And she was comforted for the creator was still creating her. Once again she was in God’s hands.

And just as God whispered to the snowflake, he whispers to you:

“In all time and space, nothing shall ever be like
you”, He says “and you are mine”.
author --I wish I knew! Anyone else know?

4 comments:

JoCo said...

hey chick-
why didnt i ask you to take my pictures for my wedding? My brain wasnt on...and now we suffer with no pictures for the reception and mostly strugglin' ones from the temple...alas, the day is documented, right??? haha. I really miss you. Lets go back to the days we used to have tons of fabulous girl time, ok? love you bunches.-c

J said...

I love your new photography site! You really have amazing talent!

Just the Three of Us said...

I loved this post...and I like your shoes too. I hope this year is better fro you too. Thanks for this Carrie!

Kristie and Ryan said...

Such an inspiring post. you're a life coach! (does that kind of rhyme...?)

Blog Widget by LinkWithin