Monday, May 23, 2011

Cover Up

By the time 7pm rolls around...bra OFF!  Sometimes, in fact, I prefer it to be earlier.  And it is then thrown around the house in the most likely and unlikely of places.  I think my favorite example of this is when we had a friend over one afternoon and after he left I noticed that my pink bra was on the table next to where he sat.  Goodness gracious.  But does that stop my incessant bra-off attitude?  Nope.

They are just SO uncomfortable! 

But I am afraid, oh so deeply afraid, that Summertime will stop my comfortable behavior once and for all.  

My predicament is early in the morning and then after work when I have to take the dog out.  Since we live in an apartment, this is not an easy task.  Especially since we have to walk him to the park where another human being will inevitably be seen.  My solution to this problem has been easily solved for the last rainy and cold 9 months.  

The long brown parka.

It's puffy, it's long, it's button up, and it covers any and all areas that need covered.  Even a hood can avert all eyes from me with a simple nod of feathery discreetness.  I can get away with wearing pink polka-dot pajama pants and a micky mouse t-shirt easily, not to mention my bra-less situation without a hitch.  And taking my daughter to the bus stop?  As normal an outfit as can be.

But then this morning, when the sun was shining and I could feel the warmth on my face while sleeveless passerby's nodded at my existence, I thought to myself..."I think I must look ridiculous."

And so what is the answer my friends?  Where do I go from here? Must I GET DRESSED before I go outside? No, I say!  There must be some other way to remain bra-less in the wee hours of the bus stop at 8am.

Here's what I have come up with so far. 

The Mumu.
Surface-covering yet fashionable, loose yet slimming....the black mumu in it's most exotic form.

The Kimono
The possibility of this being a time-consuming outfit is high, but I think the softy silky fabric and pretty pattern make up for it.

The Flamenco.
Indiscreet?  Perhaps.  But notice the feather placement?  It averts the eyes from any body parts immediately.

Any other suggestions? 
Spring is finally upon us and so this matter is of great urgency.

Sun sun stay away, come again another day.


Amy said...

hahahahaha! I vote for the mumu.

Or just go fancy-free. Who cares what people think?

Funny story: I had some "unmentionables" sitting in a heap next to the couch and my husband brought his brother over. He was sitting right next to it. I don't think he noticed it but when I saw it I said "really, Bret? You couldn't clean up a little before you brought Craig over?" (in a nice, joking sorta way while I snatched my bra off the floor and threw it out of sight.) I was so embarrassed!

Jenny P. said...

So, the other day I went to the gym and worked out, then showered and went to get dressed. It was then that I realized that I had forgotten to bring a bra. I debated whether or not I should put my nasty smelly sports bra back on, but then decided it was too gross to do it. So know what I did? I totally went bra-less. I dont' think anyone noticed. (that should serve as an indication as to how seriously I'm lacking in this particular department.)

I hope you find a solution soon. Have you ever worn a victoria secret bra? They are so stinkin comfortable, I can forget I'm wearing one.

Susan Anderson said...

I think you should definitely go with the feathers.


Amanda said...

I love winter for a number of reasons, not the least of which is the freedom to go to the store without a bra. I've got DD's...without the protection of a parka, there's no way it's advisable otherwise.

Perhaps a silk robe, a la Hugh Hefner?

Amy said...


I love the kimono, though to take the dog out, it might be a bit of overkill. you make me laugh.

Mary Seals said...

You need an "ahh" bra (or something similar). I got a Victoria's Secret version of this before they stopped making it and it is COMFY COSY.'s%20Fashion-_-494034

Bridget said...

Ha ha ha. Good luck! How about those tank tops or camisoles with built in bras? Those aren't too bad.

Jocelyn Christensen said...

How about a PONCHO!!?

Charlotte said...

Skip the cover up. Just cover your head in a paper bag (you'll probably have disguise your dog, too) and use your back door. Much more comfortable!

Kristie said...

I truly laughed outloud carrie! that is so funny!! I too am not looking forward to the warmer weather this year. can't seem to lose a single one of these extra post-pregnancy pounds, and the days of wearing my coat, sweats, and no shoes (i'm in the van) are slipping away from me. I am going to have to emerge. and if I can't wear my sweats, the only option is nakedness. nothing else fits!

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