10 days to 10 years {Day 5}

Things sped along very fast.  We HAD to spend every waking moment with one another to rehearse. Our director asked us to spend some personal time together so that we could be comfortable as husband and wife on stage (and has since claimed her role in our union.)

We willingly (and me kinda-out of my comfort zone) obliged.

Our line-rehearsals were unorthodoxed at best.  One time in particular we planned on meeting in a room away from others so that we could have some quiet to practice. I arrived with chocolate chip cookies in hand from the brand new glorious bakery a few blocks away. (Goodness!  How I miss that bakery!) I took off my coat, revealing a modest yet curve-showing shirt, sat down, and handed him my sweet treats. 

He stammored.  "Uhm...No thanks.  I don't like chocolate.  Or sweets really."

Okay.  This was a stopping point for me.  How does someone not like chocolate?  Or sweets?  Or SUGAR? 

Could have been a deal-breaker right there.  But then he continued.

"Also...could you do me a favor and put your coat back on?"

Really perplexed I asked,"uhmm..why?"

"Well, we really need to concentrate on rehearsing and I don't want to look at you lustfully."

OH MY GOSH.

Did he just say "lustfully?" 

Wow.

But...... past the silliness of the word.  Past the "just-returned-missionary" persona.  Past all that needed past.  I was enamored.  Grateful.  Stunned to silence.  

It was all so very new.  I had never before been treated with such value.  To have a man not only admit that he was attracted to me, but that he respected me enough to treat me in a way that made our interactions right then...more than that. 

I liked the feeling.

********************************************

Two weeks into our official "exclusive" dating he sat me down and said, "I am commited to you.  With that said, two things are gonna happen.  We're either going to break up or get married, so it's probably good if we figure that out."

UN-real.

He asked me to pray about it. 

Actually, he said, "will you pray about it?"

Oh boy-- did he just use his mad missionary skills on me?  Yes he did.  Yes he did.

He must have been a very good missionary.  Because I prayed about it. 

EVERY night I asked God if I should keep dating him.  And every night I felt like I should. 

So I did. 

And it was bliss. 

(oh ya-- right around this time I think I wrote that BYU boy I was basically engaged to.  Told him we might wanna take a break.  But no worries.)

to be continued...

Could you blame the guy?  Good gosh. I am so lust-worthy it hurts.

(Rowdy is pretty embarrassed that I told the story of his use of "that word."  But I swear, I die laughing every time I think of it. ha!  Aren't you so glad I shared it with you?)

10 days to 10 years {Day 4}

The next few days I watched him pour over his lines in complete concentration.  After his flirtatious comments during our rehearsals eventually subsided by the director's request, I could tell he might actually be serious about the role he was quickly casted in. 

One morning when he saw me at breakfast he asked if we could go over our lines together.  I was rude and hurried away, but I wasn't completely unfeeling--so later I came back and apologized and planned a time for us to do so. I finally realized that he wasn't actually trying to ruin my college soon to be Broadway career.  I could see that instead, he was trying to do a professional job himself.

My head was often spinning with the stress of the play.  There was so little time until the performance and it was SUCH a huge role.  Try being off stage for only 5 minutes to get changed.  In a cast of 5 people.  With you being the lead.  With the play being about YOU.  It was a tough one. 

I ended up getting sick. Really sick. 

One night after rehearsals I was lying on the couch in physical agony in the same foyer that our hip singing/playing escapade began.  He walked in--in all his suave glory--holding some just-purchased soup cans and orange juice for me.  An incredibly nice gesture and really, I was too tired to fight the flirting and wasn't it about time for me to stop my snobbishness?

He then offered to rub my shoulders.  A totally friendly shoulder rub with a zillion people around so don't get all riled up here... 

And then came the moment that everything changed.  The conversation...that opened my heart.

As we were getting all friendly, he began to tell me a bit about himself and his family. 
He just came home from his mission where he served for two years in Riverside, California.  It was a mission that he loved (and I could tell he served well by how he talked about it)...although it was definitely hard coming back and getting into the swing of things. He had three siblings and a mother.... but sadly, and suddenly, his father was killed in a car accident when Rowdy had only been out on his mission for 2 weeks -- still in the MTC (missionary training center). 

He never went home. 

Instead he stayed...choosing to serve and honor his father.

Suddenly I saw HIM.  Was the only reason I brushed him off his desire to get to know me?  Not only did that seem incredibly selfish now, but I finally realized that he was a man I wanted to get to know.  I mis-judged his confidence with ego. He was someone who impressed me more than any other.  (Sounding a bit Pride and Prejudice-like?  I have always adored Jane Austen.)

And I realized...in the quietest moment of chicken soup and orange juice...that it was time for me to get rid of MY ego and let him into my life.


to be continued...

Rowdy as my husband in the play, "Torvald."

(they can't ALL be funny, people.  But don't worry.  More shocking ones to come.)

10 days to 10 years {Day 3}

I was in a complete panic.  I sat with my head in my hands as I was told by my director that my "husband in the play" decided to drop out.  We had less than one month to perform and there was NO way that someone would take on such a huge role in such a small amount of time.  We might have to cancel it.

NO!  I said. 

I was going to beg every guy I knew until someone committed to marrying me on stage.  I would do whatever it took.  Bribe, even.  I was NOT going to miss this opportunity to perform this amazing role and become famous and then be casted on Broadway shortly thereafter.

My friend and fellow cast member Erin and I circled the cafeteria asking every boy that we knew and then some.  No takers.  In fact, we received quite a few shocked and obnoxious comments that this PG blog chooses to conceal.  I think someone even said, "heck, no."  It was appalling.

Finally, flustered and sad, we found ourselves at the ice cream bin, binging on rocky road and mint chocolate chip cones in utter sorrow. 

Suddenly.  Rowdy approached.

He had seen us circling the cafeteria and the desperation in my eyes.  He asked what was wrong and hesitantly we told him the dilemma. 

To my sheer astonishment he said,
"sooooo..if I audition and get the part...do I get to kiss you?"  (according to Rowdy these days he just wanted to get a rise out of me.  success!)

Holy Cow.  How DARE he take this very important part of my professional career and lessen it's value by using mere flirtatious comments.

I said, "HUMPH!" and walked away.  A bit rudely.  I sadly admit.

That was the end of his and my totally platonic relationship, I thought for sure.  He definitely got the hint now.

Until I saw him that night at the audition.  AUDITIONING.

He was terrible.  With a teasing haha you can't tell me to back off because I am in control of this relationship sort of way.

He got the part. 

I marched into my directors office and demanded that he be replaced by someone else.  Someone who wasn't doing this just to flirt with me.  I was a professional!  But there was no one else even slightly qualified and/or willing and she had faith in him.  What was that supposed to mean? I needed to help him with his part, she said.

Still angry, I walked into my friends room and lamented about this way-too-confident guy once again.

Then she said something that I will never forget.

"For a guy you don't like, you sure talk about him a lot."

to be continued...

(A sidenote in Rowdy's remembrance:  He said that once he realized how hard this was going to be he talked with the director..who explained how hard this was going to be.  He wrote in his journal, '"Is this really worth it for a girl?  She doesn't even act like she likes me?"  But while he was sitting in her office he felt really strongly that he should.)

10 days to 10 years {Day 2}

A few days later I ran down the steps only to see him surrounded by another crowd of girls.  Oh!...that poor poor RM status was certainly hurting him. However, he looked up immediately when he saw me coming down and said, "Carrie!" and then attempted to get my attention.  I said "Hi" and pushed my way through the crowd and walked away.  He was obviously busy. I was super busy myself.  I was contemplating taking up baton twirling again.

That evening he approached me once again in the hallway. 

He said, "Hey!  I tried to talk to you today...why did you rush off?"

"Oh..ya..well...I had to be somewhere super important."

"Okay...whatever... hey, btw, do you have a boyfriend?"

"As a matter of fact I do."

"Is he here at school?"

"Well...uhm...no."

"Is he here near by?"

"Well no...uhmm...he's at BYU (across the country.)"

"Well then, I guess he's not a problem."

Cue hanging mouth open while stunned at his candor.

Quickly...very quickly...I walked off.  BOY was this guy confident. And geez louise I didn't know what to think about him.  Seriously cute, but I was taken and busy and needed to go check out a book on baton twirling.

The next night a slew of my friends and acquaintances gathered in the main foyer.  I sat myself down and began studying my lines for a play I was recently casted in.  I was beyond excited to play the lead role of NORA in A Doll's House by Henrick Ibsen, but I was exhausted from the demand of time it required.  Finally, I closed my script and hit the floor.  Rowdy and another boy who I secretly had a crush on (even though I was basically engaged to another) began to chat with me about "what I want in a guy."

Now, I know you won't believe me...but I had NO IDEA that this was some sort of blatant flirtatious experience.  I really just thought they were asking.  In a really friendly way.  About what the requirements of my future husband would be.  TOTALLY friendly. 

After this light and airy encounter of "he has to be musically gifted and love Wal-mart midnight escapades," my friend Erin and I went back upstairs to her dorm room.  She said, "do you even REALIZE how hard they were flirting with you?"

WHATever.

I mean, I knew Rowdy was hitting on me pretty hard.  But he must have totally gotten my hint of non-availability by now.  I was sure of it.

(I didn't even know this gal was taking a picture.  I was a dreamer.)

to be continued...

10 days to 10 years {Day 1}

Rowdy and I

10 years together on August 5th 

Let's celebrate with how it all began

A story told in 10 days

I saw him in the hallway.  He was cute.  Girl's gathered all around.  Brand spank'n new Returned Missionary at a very small college. 

We said hello. Eyed each other up and down. 
And I moved on.
I was taken by a boy who lived all the way across the country, after all.

A few days after the semester started I was sitting on a couch in the foyer talking to some friends.  Everyone seemed to leave, but I stayed engrossed in my book.  He sat alone in the next room over with guitar in hand.  I noticed him.  But remember, engrossed in my book;)

Suddenly he said, "I'm Aaron...what's your name again?

"Carrie," I said.
He said "Carrie"
I hesitated, "Aaron"
He said, "Carrie"
I said, "Aaron"
*The back and forth was awkward and funny at the same time*
He said, "Now you won't forget my name."

He was right. 

After a few questions on my reading material he said, "Come on over.  I need a friend."  I literally hopped on over to his couch.  I was everyone's friend.  Of course.

I was so very cute in my torn jeans, cream and orange retro sweater, and orange hat which I will always be famous for.  He wore some tan cords and a cream thermal-type shirt.  With his guitar and really big grin, he was nothing short of suave. 

We began to "jam".  We both sang while he played.  Just a friendly encounter, because doesn't everyone "jam" in college?  It was so friendly-cool. We were so hip singing and playing and looking all trendy in our cute outfits and dazzling smiles. The only thing that would have upped the experience would be if I was also a baton twirler.  Darn my quiting in 8th grade.

I was impressed with his playing and then quickly found out that he couldn't read music and instead did it all by ear.  A couple guitar lessons when he was a teenager and that was it.  I was floored.  Not only was he way-cute, but also naturally talented.  Nice mix.

Enter more singing and playing and hip-ness and lack-of baton twirling.

Then class got out.  Floods of girls entered.  They noticed him immediately and they all sat down listening to his natural guitar playing talent.

So I left.

Let's get something straight.  I wasn't ONE of the girls, you know.  Plus, I was taken, remember?

Rowdy (left) and his friend Nick early '00.

to be continued...

Winner(s)!

Winner of My Summer Giveaway

Via Random.org. 

kladle!

And doesn't it just make you sad when you don't win?  I never win anything.  And BELIEVE me I try.  So how fun would it be if everyone won something?

All who entered will get a 5x7 of a print of your choice from the giveaway post.

YAY for winners!

*email me what picture you want and your address, please.

she makes me smile

I find that so often I get caught up in the frustration of parenthood.  The please please pleases.  The wants and needs of one so young and spirited.

And then at night with a pre-popcorn-and-a-movie random dance performance I am reminded of the laughter that she brings to me. I don't know what I ever did to deserve my darling girl, but I am oh-so-thankful for her and her silliness. 

She is so completely truly innately good.  Beyond the begging to go outside and play 50 times a day and the usual trials of an eight year old, there is a girl who is perfectly
Sweet.  Kind.  Funny. 

And one who wholly steals my heart.

I love how she wants to constantly perform for us.  I love how often we have to ask her to stop her vibrant singing.  I love how her favorite family night is sushi and a movie. She is darling and fun and growing way too fast.

I love everything about her. 
Even the drama (because it is how I know she is mine.)

 

this pouty face has NEVER worked.  I don't know why she still tries it;)

She makes me smile.

Not sure if I said it loud enough before...

I'm having a
GIVEAWAY

that means me.
giving something away.
to you.
amazing, isn't it?

do I need to add some homebaked goodies?  would that get you excited?

oh all right.  i'll add something yummy, too. 

sheesh.

My Summer Giveaway

I don't have any cool products to give because frankly, no one sends me products to review to give away, which frankly, is totally rude;)

BUT, I do have my simple-me photography.  It's how I express my love for life...and for you.

You will receive:

• (1) 8x10 of any of the prints shown below
• (1) homemade lavender gift sewn by me (freshly picked from the lavendar capital of the USA here in Washington)
• (1) super cute card made and designed by my daughter ;)

Here's how to enter: (each one counts as an entry, so you could do all 3)

• leave a comment of your favorite post from the last year (Aug '09 to July '10)
• become a follower and let me know with a comment (this is so wierd of me to ask but apparently this is all the rage on only the coolest of blogs)
• blog about it/twitter and let me know with a comment

Giveaway ends on Sunday July 25th

Winner announced Monday

half eaten

Often, too often, I find a half-eaten apple uniquely and artistically placed by my son around the house.  On the counter, on the table, by the bed stand, in the car, and here...today...on his toy shelf in his room.  I remembered when he grabbed it to begin with this afternoon.  He exclaimed, "Can I have it?  It is so so shiny!"  Never to complain when my children want fruit, I washed it off and handed it to him and he was oh-so-excited as he took his first crispy bite.

And then I found it later. Half-eaten.  Half-browning.  Half-discarded.

But didn't it use to be so shiny and delicious?  What changed?  Did he get full?  Was he distracted?  Did he simply change his mind?

I've often wondered if I do the same thing with choices in my life.  How noncommittal I sometimes am.  How often I jump in with an excited endeavor only to stop half-way.

I refuse to make new years resolutions simply because I know that I will be disappointed with myself in the end.  A pessimistic view or realistic?  I'm not sure.  I honestly think that I am simply sometimes too distracted to always finish what I start.  Not that it wasn't a very reachable goal--but life has a tendency to get in the way.

I haven't physically felt like myself in a really long time.  So long--years-- that one would think I would be sick of not feeling like myself enough to do something about it.  In fact, I am tearing up a bit writing this. But I am always halted by life.  By hiccups in the road.  By giving up.  By being distracted.  By feeling like I am not worth the time and effort to finish. 

My weight-- has been a source of utter sorrow for me since my son was born.  I have always always struggled, but 1 1/2 years  after my daughter was born (with really hard work) I was back into my pre-pregnant body.  Not so much this time.  Granted, the amount of stress that I have been through these past few years has not allowed my body to truly be itself again.  But really, how many excuses can I give? 

This year I have lost some weight.  I'm smaller than I have been in 4 1/2 years.  But I still have so much more to go.  I had my end goal-- the end of this month in fact--and I am nowhere near that point.  What's worse is that I was going to celebrate with a family photo shoot by BlueLily.  We have never had one done since Kai was born and I crave their style (and the fact that they are coming to Seattle) so this was a VERY big deal to me.  And yet...  no goal reached, no photo shoot will be done, no power felt within. 

I am feeling like that apple.  A lot like that apple.

But then I remember that not all is lost.

I am writing this out loud because I want to remember this struggle knowing that the end result will be that much better for it. 

I will reach my goal THIS year.  And I will be proud of myself.  And I will finish what I started.

Soon.  I will be my best self.

I like oranges better, anyway.

Featured!

To my surprise this morning I woke up to see a lovely feature of my Lemon Party on Tatertots and Jello! You know, I had hoped that one day I would be recognized for my photography and/or writing.  But this works, too;) I'm so glad it has been inspirational to so many...it was certainly lovely to do and I hope that others can plan even more lemon-y goodness of their own because of it. 

You'll thank me later

We started a new Rock'n PROGRAM around these here parts. A Chore slash Discipline slash Responsibility slash Wise Choices slash Be Good Program.  CDRWCBGP for short.  (J/K)
My main concerns before starting this rock'n new thing that we are doing (this will be a future pun --so excitedly read on...) were:

1) My kids don't always listen.
2) My kids don't always do chores happily.
3) My kids are sometimes obnoxious.
4) My kids sometimes yell and run around like hooligans. (where is Mary Poppins when you need her?)
5) My kids are not always obedient.

I was gosh darn tired of it all.  Especially during Summer.  Especially since apartment living doesn't allow for sprinkler play -- ahem-- Serene.

Enter THE PROGRAM

I wanted to award the kids for doing summer reading/learning using a point system.  Then Rowdy had the brilliant idea of adding the chores to it as well.  Then I had the brilliant idea of adding manners to it as well.  And we were on a rock'n roll (oh my gosh the pun suspense is killing me)...

Every TO DO would be worth a point and then there would be ACTIVITIES that cost points.  But after that I was stuck, because how could we keep track of all the points? I tried a spreadsheet-- but realized that it would be too hard to tally/subtract/add/use, etc. 

THEN I read the brilliant idea from Charlotte not a day after I came up with our plan.  So I totally didn't take it from her, I would like to point out (wowzers- these puns are awesome).  However, I did use her finishing touches to help a girl out. Like, why not add "take-away-points" for yelling, hitting, being obnoxious, etc.  BRILLIANT. 

She also answered my prayers by using a "marble in a jar" system with each marble representing 1 point.  Did I mention the word brilliant? 

 But in our case, we use small ROCKS  (there it is!  The pun has been revealed!).  I found a huge jar of vase filler at the store to split between the both of them.

We have a chart for each kiddo to make the responsibilities age appropriate.  It takes Kai less points to earn an ice cream cone then it would Brianna and the cost of points for her activities are much more as well.  She has the potential to earn quite a  few if all goes well in one day, so going to get a manicure costs more than it would to go to the park for Kai.

Here are some from Brianna's chart for example:

If You:
Sweep kitchen floor +1 pt
Read 2 books to Kai  +1 pt
Make bed  +1pt
3 pages in school workbook +2pts
Read 1 Harry Potter Book +25 pts

If You:
Yell or scream  -1pt
Talk back -1pt
Disobey -1pt
Leave clothes on floor -1pt

You Can Earn:
Manicure -45 pts
Family Fun Center -50pts
Panda Express -25 pts
Movie Theater -45 pts
Go get ice cream -15 pts

Just yesterday we went out for ice cream because both the kids wanted to spend rather than save.  "I'm going to take away a rock" has some serious power these days.  Kai thinks it's a race, (which after a certain 2 minute reflection on whether that is what we are trying to teach him or not), I am happy about because he is LOVING the competition.

So far my kids are total angels. 

ROCK ON!

FYI- friends can NOT help. (I didn't say my kids stopped being trixie)

and oh ya-- cuz I am never in any pictures since i am always taking them-- here i am at the end of my work day with blurred make-up and a wide angle lense at a wierd angle and bad lighting.  enjoy.  now that i am looking at this more thoroughly..i think i might regret putting this up here...

Today I wish

(source)

 

Today I am sad because the sun is so lovely and I can't soak it up with my children. 

Today I wish I wasn't a working mom.

 Today I wish I could take the kids to the park and look at the clouds and blow some bubbles. 

Today I wish I could go to the farmers market before it closes. 

Today I wish I could wear my flip flops instead of high heels and not have to re-apply the lipstick after lunch. 

Today I wish I could go to the library and pick up that Harry Potter book Brianna has been aching to read.

Today I wish I could start making Caesar salad fresh
from my garden before 6pm.

 And so... when I am no longer a working mom...

I will remember that wish and be grateful that I can
take the kids to the park and look at the clouds and blow some bubbles. and go to the farmers market before it closes.
and wear my flip flops instead of high heels and not have to re-apply the lipstick after lunch.
and go to the library and pick up that Harry Potter book Brianna has been aching to read.
and start making Caesar salad fresh from my garden at 5:59pm.


I won't take that day and that life for granted again. 
Not ever.  

One of my biggest faults.

(There are many, of course), but the one that I wish that I could get past is the fact that I compare myself to other women. 

All. The. Time.

It is such an undesirable trait and so hindering to my growth and my spirit. Just wondering...how do you get past things like this?  How do you move forward... loving yourself and your place in life... regardless of what others have accomplished or who they appear to be?

Especially in this blog world, don't you think?  Everyone putting their best foot forward.  I have tried to not be like that.  In fact, sometimes I might be a little too honest in some sorrows in my life.  But that is one thing I am proud of because if this IS my journal, then it needs to be about who I really am.  Imperfect.

So darling friends, what are your thoughts on feelings of inadequacy?  How do you stop comparing?

***UPDATE***  Heather just left a comment about a link to go check out and I have to say it was such a heavenly call to do so.. Check this out. I am so grateful to have read it. 

Plus, thank you so much...all your comments and thoughts are very much appreciated!

It's the little things

This morning I woke up and realized that I had forgotten to turn the dishwasher on last night.  Ugh.  My sanity requires waking up to a clean kitchen in the AM, and that means that dishes have to be washed and ready to be put away when I wake up, too. Then I went to open the door to put soap in and turn it on but "wait!" they were washed. 

It's the little things that make me love him.

We planted a "container garden" this year.  Our very first garden, actually.  We've had the casual tomato and pepper plants and herbs, but this time we planted potatoes and carrots and lettuce and peppers and tomatoes and 3 kinds of thyme and garlic and leeks and spinach, etc.  Even though all we have is a patio, we made the most of it. 

Every night I see him snipping and pruning and watering and caring for our little green ones.  And every night he asks me to come out and look with him.  Look at what we have grown.  And so I sometimes do and I am amazed at the growth in just one day as he points out the new sprouts and what he did to hopefully "make this one healthier."

It's the little things that make me love him.


  

How you know it's Summertime

Rowdy made sure that they put some change in the tip jar before they began.  To give people the idea, of course. Because paying 1 dollar for homemade lemonade really isn't enough.

PS. Now is probably not the time to learn about marketing/business skills.  According to Brianna, she doesn't care if she does it at a time of day when no one is home.  And she doesn't care if putting signs on mailboxes announcing the time of opening is only 5 minutes before they open (when no one is home.)  And she doesn't care if her parents have any advice on how, from a business standpoint, she might want to consider running the show (when people are home.) 

Did the day end well?  Of course.  Because even though she is still in debt to her parents for $1.55, Brianna has learned that "the UPS MAN is a great tipper!"

Don't worry folks, we're trying again tomorrow. 

When people are home.

Breakfast Request

Apparently this is the month of my posting about food. Strawberries for this week in particular. Lemons for the week before that. Which would make the past few weeks all about strawberries and lemons and don't worry I'll stop after this one... it's just my life right now, you know? Can you blame me?

We found this note from Brianna one morning and the next thing I knew Rowdy was cooking up a storm. Then he told me that Kai requested waffles, so could I get started on that one? Of course.

It is such a good thing that I had this honey strawberry jam-accidentally-turned-syrup because it was seriously divine on these babies.

Fresh whipped cream and we had some Rainier cherries on the side (as requested)

These are my famous whole wheat belgium waffles. I'll post the recipe if you really really want me to;)

Sugar and Milk

I never ate sugary cereal as a child. Instead, I poured myself some healthy cheerios and then poured a couple spoonfuls of sugar on top. So embarrassing to admit. I still remember the scrape of my spoon on the sugar and milk at the bottom of the bowl. Like pulling wet sand with your shovel when you are sitting at the edge of water.

Sugar and milk have always been lovers.

And I was never ever ever hyper afterwards.

Well, around here, SOMEONE who shall remain nameless but rhymes with "howdy" likes to buy the kids cereal that is completely and unequivocally bad for them. Like Lucky Charms. And Fruit Loops. And Apple Jacks. Because he got such a great deal. Even when I say no. Even when I say No. Even when I say NO.

They always end up in my house and the kids always sneak to partake if they wake up before me and they always crash after their sugar high is over. Sometimes I am so obliviously tired in the morning that I pour them a bowl myself.

Am I a bad mother for allowing this always-ness to happen?

Speaking of Lucky Charms..

Once upon a time when I was a teenager in a house of 11 siblings, cereal was a coveted daily battle. Being in the older group, we were told that we couldn't have the good "sugary" cereal because it was for the little group. It was always disappointing to be eating TOTAL12-Vitamins and Minerals next to a 5 year old with Cocoa Krispies.

I will never understand my mother's reasoning for either.

Well, one day in Seminary I was lamenting about how the little group always get the good cereal and gosh darn-it I could just kill for some Lucky Charms. They were my favorite.

The very next day when my crush who-didn't-know-he-was-my-crush-but-had-to-be-because-he-was-the-only-guy-over-16-in-my-church was driving me home from Seminary but didn't stop at my house. I was like, "what are you doing? I have to get ready for school!" And he said, "I am kidnapping you." OH.MY.GOSH.

He drove up to his house and went inside. I sat there for a minute completely confused and then went inside, too. On his kitchen table was a box of Lucky Charms with milk and a bowl and spoon.

Sugar and milk have always been lovers.

Too bad they make you comatose, too.

We be Jam'n

We made a ton of Strawberry Jam last week. What else were we going to do with 50 pounds of hand-picked strawberries? Yep. You heard me. 50 pounds.

(I'd like to take this moment of blog space silence to remember the hands that not only picked, but also prepped and prepared our 50 pounds of strawberries by cleaning, sorting, removing stems, etc., so that jam could be made in the first place. Rowdy... the one and only person to perform this task...you deserve my sincerest gratitude and the gratitude of all who giveth gratitude. As a gift, you will receive a pint of strawberry jam. and maybe another somethin somethin)

So we froze some because I lu-uv me some smoothies, but then we decided to get jam'n around here and make some jam'n jam. And how many more times do you think I can reference the word "jam?" One more time, apparently.

After the first batch I wasn't entirely satisfied, so I decided to take the opportunity of using such strawberry bounty to experiment with different recipes. Then we did an official taste test of all of them.


Here's our thoughts:

1. Dear Strawberry-Honey Jam, you were missing the fresh lavender because I checked everywhere and nobody seemed to have any since June was June-uary around here with all the blasted cold rain. So we made due, only you wouldn't thicken at all. You were my first. And you left me totally annoyed and unsatisfied (this could really go somewhere but I will refrain from my childish thoughts.) Thankfully, you make some fab Strawberry Honey Syrup for pancakes!

2. Dear Ball recipe from the pectin box, I figured you would be a winner, but gee whiz you had me foaming! Or you foaming. Or something like that. It was hard to clear you up-- but you did gel very nicely in the end, so thank you for that. Your flavor was pretty good, but sorry, not my favorite. You asked for far too much sugar and I didn't give you what you asked for. I'm prideful like that.

3. Dear Ina, love your lemon flava. Who woulda thought that you could be so zesty? Rowdy says you are the brightest of the bunch. I say true dat, but I didn't like your gel in the freezer test because you never said it had to be in there 1-2 minutes like Martha said. You just said 'until it gels'. Can you understand how I might be confused by that statement? Loved your sterilizing tips though...

4. Dear Martha, yours took entirely too long to thicken (like 2 hours) and you called for too much sugar. You drove me crazy. Rowdy says you are too sweet. I beg to differ because you were a pain in my #$%. Since it took so long to cook you down into a gel-like state, you lost all your super cute chunks. How sad. Otherwise, you do taste a lot like a good store-bought brand only better because I made you. Just to be cool we added some lemon zest to brighten you up a bit. Oh good grief, don't take offense... you know you loved it.


Recap of FLAVOR: Loved #1 for the honey flavor and the awesome syrup adaptation that was totally on purpose. #2 was good but nothing amazing. #3 we liked the most because it was not too sweet and we even added some orange thyme to our last batch of it. #4 was your basic yummy strawberry jam, but we would reduce the sugar some next time.

Alrighty folks.

Get to Jam'n.

Like what you see here? Would you appreciate a review of YOUR jam'n skills? Applications will be accepted once my own stash of strawberry jam has been completely eaten. Which could be about 5 years or so...

When did you grow?

this week you played copy-cat every day.


Pick up your toys Kai

Pick up your toys Kai

Stop copying me Kai

Stop copying me Kai

No seriously, stop it

No seriously, stop it

Good grief

Good grief

Who taught you this?

Who taught you this?

Brianna! Did you teach him this?

No Brianna not teach me. You are silly mommy.



Stop growing, my boy.